ughhh sorry body

So i didnt last the whole weekend i cracked i was at the guys house that im seeing and he made me breakfast in bed, i knew he would suspect something if i went to the bathroom afterwards cause he knows of my previous eating disorders so i had 2 hard boiled eggs and a piece of rye toast that'll be it for my day, i gotta get down to my goal weight and be thin no one wants a fat chick.. Im down to 166 btw so thats 4 lbs this wk, that waas this morning before breakfast so who knows, im going for a run later and we did have se so some calories were burned with that. im so dissapointed in myself its crazy this feeling of immediate guilt and hate for everything going into my mouth i know i could have gone longer with my liquid fast maybe i'll have a purge party tonight maybe a binge to.. have a good little party we'll see what happens.